August 20, 2009

Samantha's 3-yr Physical

So I have had a really hard time finding a pediatrician I'm happy with at Balboa, but since Samantha's CF dr is so fantastic (and requires our gen ped to be there) I try to look over it. And it's not just that there are some really bad doctors, it's also a bad, impersonal process. A few months ago when Samantha was sick, I stumbled on a doctor I was quite pleased with, so I scheduled both annual physicals today with him. Well, he did not disappoint!

Potty Training

Samantha is 3 1/2 and still not potty trained. There's no way to say that without embarrassment. This is the mark of a good mother, right? I keep trying to remind myself to chill out, but facts are facts so I mentioned it today. He reminded me every child goes at their own pace, and then asked me what our issues are...

A) We can't quite make the switch from me taking her every hour to her telling me that she needs to go BEFORE she wets

B) Any kind of bowel movement on the toilet is out of the question.

He gave me 2 techniques to use for kids who can have a propensity for constipation or digestive issues (CFers). I'm still going to share them because if you have a child who is #1 trained, but not #2 trained they may help you...
  1. There is a body position that anatomically allows for elimination more easily than any other, and you can email me ( if you want to know it. When we got home, I knew she needed to "go" before naptime, so I tried it and sure enough it works!!! Now we have a long way to go in the training area, but I'm convinced of this body position tip.
  2. The other thing he said to do was spend about 15 or so minutes on the toilet after each meal. There is a reflex in the body that tells the colon to eliminate in order to make room for the food that is on its way. This is why infants will often poop after a feeding, and it's the same concept even at age 3. Right after meal time is a more likely time to be able to poop. He said stay in there whether or not she needs to, but don't make it reading time or tv watching time or anything. It's purpose is for pooping (I asked if we could sing or talk, and he said yes). I think this could also help her go longer to urinate. If she knows every 4 hours she'll be on the potty she may practice holding it. Who knows? But the intent of this exercise is for pooping.
My philosophy in all these random parenting milestones with preschoolers is that I would rather hear 100 tips if it gets me to the 1 I need that works in my situation. These may be common, but they are 2 tips I had yet to be told. So we'll try them, and if they work they work. If they don't work, we'll be right where we were before...learning to be patient!


One month ago Samantha started stuttering out of the blue. I don't really know how to explain it, but it's extreme. After 4 years of speech therapy (with Timothy) you would think I would have a clue, but I don't. Everything I've found online talked about kids "growing" out of it by age 7. I'm thinking that's 4 years!!!! As far as I'm concerned she can grow out of it while she's being treated. Thankfully, the doctor took this seriously. He didn't know if it would be best to go through developmental (speech pathologist) or the psychology route (behavior mod/anxiety), so he's going to find out, and we'll get a referral to one or the other!

I've got a school fair, karate, and Awana leaders meeting tonight, so I've got to scoot out the door. I'll write about Timothy's appt later!


Somer Love said...

Is it weird to ask but I wonder if that position will help when I have issues or does it just work on toddlers?

Stephanie's Mommy Brain said...

You are NOT a bad mom!!

Potty training requires a LOT of different skills. 1. Learning to hold it in. 2. Learning to recognize when you need to go to the bathroom. 3. Self-discipline to stop playing something fun to go to the bathroom (not so fun). 4. Learning to push it out when they want to. 5. Learning to deal pull down/up their clothes.

Ellie turns 3 next week. She is mostly trained. I say mostly because if she's playing something fun she'll still choose that over the potty. And she doesn't always wake up dry.

The ideas for poop are great! I'm sorry I hadn't mentioned these to you. Will has poop issues so I've started making him sit on the toilet for 15 minutes after each meal. Also, because he's so thin I can tell when his belly starts to pooch out that he needs to go. I set a timer for him so he knows when he can get up. It is working for us!

Another thing that helps is poop inducing foods, like raisins. I know you have weight issues with Sam so I'm not sure how much tip that helps.

PS. Your success as a mom has nothing to do with how soon your child sleeps through the night, is potty trained or learns to read. Your success as a mom is based on if you kids know you love them and the character you help them develop. I know that you know this. But sometimes it's nice to hear someone say it. :)

Alicia said...

Steph, it is nice to hear! One level I remember those, and then something will happen where I'm hearing everyone talk about those things that don't matter and I get caught up in that! Just internally, not with them. And I want to remember it on both sides (not just the delays, but also when my children are on the front end). Just because my child may do something sooner doesn't make me a good mom either.

It's exactly what you said-knowing they are loved and the character I'm developing.